Dear sisters,
I often consider the pros and cons of listing my long association with Zen Buddhism on my professional website. On the positive side, I believe it helps women who are looking for a specific type of therapeutic relationship to find me. Many women have experienced great benefit from exploring yoga, mindfulness, and other spiritual and secular practices based in Eastern philosophies. When they see evidence that I speak the language of mindfulness and compassion and that I understand that body and mind and spirit (and politics and culture) are interconnected, it serves as a shortcut in the very emotional and complex process of finding a therapist who feels like a good fit.
However, I worry that sharing that I am a former yoga teacher and that I was ordained in the Soto Zen Buddhist tradition gives the impression that I have had nothing but positive experiences with mind/body practices in general and Zen Buddhism specifically. In fact, I have had both very positive and very negative experiences with both. One pattern has repeated often enough that I have stopped participating in organized spiritual groups altogether.
That pattern, unfortunately, is gender-based violence and abuse and the pervasive gaslighting and secrecy necessary to maintain the myth that Buddhist and yoga communities are immune to this type of behavior.
Not only are devout yogis and Buddhists capable of gender-based violence and abuse—just about every Buddhist tradition is guilty of harboring abusers and, after the abuse comes to light, also guilty of failing to issue any significant form of censure or consequence. You will find photos of known abusers on the walls of yoga studios. You will chant the names of known abusers at Buddhist services. You will read glowing tributes to abusers on the landing page of just about every Buddhist community’s website.
What do these traditions have in common? They all are deeply rooted in a patriarchal lineage. Buddhism, like just about every ancient spiritual tradition, is based on 2500 years of exclusively male authority. Until very recently, every single Buddhist lineage has revered a long list of men who chose, generation after generation, to erase women’s names, wisdom, and contributions to the tradition. Change is beginning to happen in some Buddhist traditions, but it is slow and even now there is resistance to creating truly safe and equitable practice communities.
Here is an open letter I composed to American Zen communities in in which I discuss the epidemic of clergy sex abuse and the failure to properly sanction abusers, protect vulnerable people, and meaningfully break with the deeply harmful patriarchal tradition of honoring the masculine and erasing the feminine.
If you feel you would benefit from joining a meditation group or Buddhist practice community, I encourage you to seek out information on that group’s history of teacher/clergy sex abuse. You will be unlikely to find the information easily—many Buddhist communities have posted statements of ethics and grievance reporting policies on their websites and claim to be committed to safety and equity. These same communities often insist on whitewashing the reputations of known abusers and even hold these men up as examples of wisdom and ethical conduct despite the crimes they’ve committed.
The sexual abuse of women is abuse no matter who the perpetrator is—a father, a husband, or a Buddhist priest. It is an act of violence and it is a crime. Until all yoga and Buddhist communities understand this and act accordingly, I don’t believe that they are safe spaces for women or other people of vulnerable genders.
Warmly,
Sheryl
Looking for a space that centers women’s safety? Contact me here.